For some of our more recent folks that have joined us lately I will try to explain what these segments are about.
If you don’t get the jest, just skip on to the next post. Our core group of people try to add a little laughter and joy to our readers and roughly once a month we will try to break the stress of day to day life by trying to have some fun. Here we go…..
The photo 📷 up top was provided by our dedicated and beloved Track 👣 and Field plus Cross Country Coach, Mr. Shawn Montgomery. Coach is hosting one of his two home meets tomorrow afternoon. He have written many a story about how much we appreciate the efforts of Coach because he absolutely gets what we are trying to do in regards to providing coverage to EVERY Student Athlete that competes for him.
Coach knows we want to list all of his athletes efforts whether they finish 1st or 9th or 35th in their event. We want to show appreciation for everyone who gives of themselves to train and compete while wearing our School colors.
So we have been writing ✍ a great deal about just how intelligent that our correspondent Shannon Dalton is. Well, it turns out that she is even smarter than we realized.
In the early stages of forming our crack staff we realized that we needed a public face for the team. A local Celebrity if you will that we could use as a Spokesperson. We landed on Laurel Fork’s Kris Richardson.
Richardson knew just how much we needed him to be the 🙎♀️🙎♂️ face of our efforts so he negotiated hard and landed a personal services contract for $2.5 million dollars. We had to take on a ton of extra responsibility to generate that kind of money 💰 but we eventually got it done. We then buried the paperwork so deep that we were fairly sure nobody would ever find out.
We heard rumors that Richardson spent his entire take on Duke University keepsakes that he has stored in his man cave in the lower level of his family 👪 home 🏡.
Marion Harris is the Heart ❤ of what we do and Richardson is the face but we desperately needed to find someone who was capable of being the Brains 🧠 of our operation.
Shannon Dalton enters the picture and she is beyond perfect for what we need but somehow she went through back channels to find out about the deal that Richardson received. The deal was in a sealed file but some one led her to it.
Her asking price became $2.51 Million Dollars 💵. We don’t have that kind of money lying around but we cannot lose her, she’s too valuable to us. I asked her what in the World would she do with that kind of $$$$.
The answer was she had stumbled across a pair of earrings she liked and that was the cost of the pair. I immediately thought to myself what would a pair of earrings that cost that much even look like???????
So we go out in search of a way to create $2.51 Million Dollars 💵 and the only answer we could find was to approach Coach Montgomery 🤔. His contract is legendary so we put together a production deal that includes the rights to handle two home meets with a player option on a third one. Our asking price ? Of course it was $2.51 Million Dollars 💵..
Right after we all signed the legal documents, Coach Montgomery looked up and asked me about the agreed upon amount? When I explained to him where the funds would be going, he quipped, must be quite a pair of earrings!
Tomorrow afternoon I will wonder across the street to the Press Box and the school and begin my time as the 2023-2024 Track and Field PA guy 👦.
I am quite the fan of the program and the Student Athletes that compete for Coach. The verbiage will be different and the timing will have to be learned but I will give it everything I have !!
Bare with me for the beginning process but once we get the ball rolling it should be fun !
Thank You Coach Montgomery for bailing we out of a jam.
Feel free to mention to Mrs. Dalton that you heard about her earrings.
A.S.P.N on The Hill 